Tag Archives: golden

PULLING A GEORGE LUCAS: The ending to “We Are Golden”

(we switch from BILL’s worried face in bed to his worried face in an office, sitting in a chair. His hair is still a bit askew, tie undone, shirt rumpled. He is not as together as when we saw him in the show’s beginning. We see him staring directly into the camera, looking worried enough to vomit. It’s obvious that he’s being talked to over a polished wooden desk with lots of papers and inspirational bric-a-brac festooned upon it… but we do not hear what’s being said.)

BILL: (responding after a long pause and an audible gulp.)
I… I understand. Completely. Understand completely… I just didn’t think I was really doing anything wrong, I’m sorry… hm? What was that? Well yes, I guess it could put the wrong ideas into the student’s heads but, well… I was trying to create a very open learning environment, you know… open dialogues with the students, no secrets. We’re supposed to connect with them, right?

I see. I understand. Yes, I suppose it could have ended badly. Yes, I will take any of the backlash that might come from the parents or the district. I understand. I’m sorry for causing all this trouble… it wasn’t my… my intent, to cause trouble. I was just… I was just being honest with the students… (he laughs nervously) is that so bad?

Right, right… I understand. There can be such a thing as too much connection with the students, I understand.

(we see the door open behind him, and MARY walks in, still looking the same as she did in the opening number: red flannel, black jeans, blonde ponytail. she is NOT happy. The BOY follows her, quietly and meekly.)

MARY: What the fuck is this shit?

(BILL casts a nervous look in her direction, but tries to ignore it as he’s obviously listening to the person still giving him a dressing down. The BOY attempts to shush her, and she raises a hand, causing the BOY to flinch and fall silent. MARY begins to shout, trying to steal his attention away. Obviously, she is unseen to all except BILL and the audience.)

MARY: You’ve got to be fucking kidding me! You’re apologizing? You’re APOLOGIZING?! You’re saying you’re sorry for having feeling, for being who you are? You’re apologizing… for me? I’m you, I’m who you really are, why should you apologize?!

BILL: (to the invisible superintendent) Yes, I understand. It could have been dangerous. Yes, the students are impressionable, I just…
(he gives a nervous smile and humbles his shoulders. This drives MARY further into a rage.)

MARY: (standing to one side of the chair, arms akimbo)
So you were talking about hermaphroditic organisms, and the kids were making a fuss. You tried to open their heads, make them think beyond girl and boy…mentioned even you get in touch with your feminine side…with me… and you’re apologizing for it, I can’t fucking believe it. You speak your mind, and you have to apologize. You were trying to help those kids! You were trying to get them to use their fucking brains for a change! You were trying to tell them to put down the crack pipe and stop acting like idiots… isn’t that your fucking JOB?!

(standing on the other side of the chair, wringing his arms)
BOY: Don’t be so cruel, please…

BILL: I won’t do it again. I understand… what? Is it true? Well, yes, I have questioned…doesn’t everyone?

I see…

MARY: Christ… all you were trying to do is make them more tolerant, and here THEY are, trying to shut YOU up! You could sue, you could fuck ’em up royally… but you won’t, will you?

BILL: Leave with pay? You want me… to leave?

MARY: You wimp, you spineless fool, you fucking PUSSY! Yeah, that’s right, run away! Run away, like you always do! Run away from me! Run away from YOU!

BOY: You’re not running away, Bill…

MARY: SHUT UP, KID!

BILL: Yes, I’ll come back. I can teach other grades, yes… I’ll do it. Thank you. Thank you.

(he stands up and makes to shake a hand, and MARY hurls his chair across the room. She causes Holy Havoc around the office: ripping books off walls, upsetting tables, messing up the desk as the song starts, MARY in a mocking, nasal tone, referring to BILL, the BOY, and the unseen accuser.)

MARY:
What’s the matter with going places?
Take that gross look off your faces
Empty lovin’ makes me seasick
What you’re here for, I don’t need it

(she moves in close to BILL’s face as he’s standing there, half in and half out of reality.)
Sing nothing on your microphone
til you swear to take me home
(she points to the BOY, scathingly)
There’s a one foot boy, eleven stone
Sittin on my shoulder

BOY: (meekly.)
I’m too scared to look away,
Comes here almost everyday

MARY: (circling around BILL and shoving the BOY. Poking him in the chest.)
And everyday I push him off
And tell him boy we’re over

BILL: (putting his head in his hands)
my oh my
I think my mind is gone and left here
wondering why it’s crazy all alone
what do I do
Nothin’ left but pray
Gonna shoot somebody
Help me drive this craziness away
I’m happy on my own

BOY: (in a long, drawn out, sad wail)
Don’t stay! Get lost in you/rescue me

MARY: (still mocking)
One foot boy, (she repeats this four times, with BILL constantly underneath droning)

BILL:
I’m happy on my own
I’m happy on my own
I’m happy on my own
I’m happy on my…

MARY: (cutting him off. The scene moves farther into a black void, not unlike the “Good Gone Girl” segment.)

Say you like me, not with changes
Shut up and forget it, these are my faces

(she again gestures to BILL and the BOY)

All these colours, that surround me

(she drops a large rainbow flag behind the proceedings, grinning. Various pictures of the same idea start to roll in the background as if on a slide show.)

All these places, only drown me

(she moves in again, right into BILL’s ear.)

Sing nothing on your microphone
til you swear to take me home
There’s a one foot boy, eleven stone
Sittin on my shoulder

BILL: (taking the BOY’s line, as the BOY is now almost completely silent.)

I’m too scared to look away,
Comes here almost everyday

MARY:
And everyday I push him off
And tell him boy we’re over

BILL: (standing bolt upright, tense, trying to keep it together.)
my oh my
I think my mind is gone and left here
wondering why it’s crazy all alone
what do I do
Nothin left but pray
Gonna shoot somebody
Help me drive this craziness away
I’m happy on my own

BOY: (wailing again in descant)
Don’t stay! Get lost in you/rescue me

MARY: (reveling as she’s obviously winning this fight)
What’s the matter with going places?
Take that gross look off your faces
Empty lovin’ makes me seasick
What you’re here for, I don’t need it

BOY:
Don’t stay! Get lost in you/rescue me

MARY:
One foot boy, one foot boy, one foot boy, one foot boy

BILL: (crumpling, pulling at his hair, leaving the last phrase to be sung solo.)
I’m happy on my own, I’m happy on my own
I’m happy on my own.

(the two aspects disappear in a flash, and BILL is back in front of the desk, but very, very pale. He nods and, with rubbery legs, exits the office. We see a tracking shot following him, rolling backwards as he walks forwards, his head and shoulders framed in the shot. In a shock reveal, MARY reappears from offscreen to the right, walking beside him.)

MARY: You can’t get rid of me that easily. I’m you. As much as you hate me, I’m you, and you can’t be rid of me!

(the boy enters the hallway on the left side of the screen, over his right shoulder.)
BOY: Please be careful, please. Think it through, remember… think about it…please…

(MARY rounds on the BOY and knocks him out with one vicious punch. The BOY crumples to the floor, and it is MARY and BILL exiting the office. They pass an auditorium as MARY goads him further.)

MARY: That’s better! (she grins wolfishly) Now… let me try this again…

(she walks in front of him, making him stop short. She beckons him into the darkened auditorium as lights magically kick on, showing a puppet stage set up in the spotlight. A bouncy tune starts up, completely jarring, as MARY begins the puppet show. A marionette puppet representation of BILL as a young boy [no goatee] hops onto the stage and begins singing, half in MARY’s voice and half in his.)

BILL PUPPET:
I’m a wind-up toy in an up down world
If you leave me all alone, I’ll make a mess for sure
I’ve a heart of gold in the smallest size
Leave me in the dark, you’ll never hear me cry

(various “puppet dancing” a la Pinnochio)
More than an illustration
Points of articulation
Come to life on a brass spring
Such a wonderful plaything

(a puppet in a red and gray striped sweater flies in. the BILL puppet moves toward it.)
It’s a cruel cross that I have to bear
If you come a little close I’m going to pull your hair
More than just a toy in a patched blue suit
Hold me in your arms I’m just a boy like you

(the two boy puppets embrace, but the one in red and gray pushes him away and sings half in MARY’s voice and half in JAKE’s. A puppet representation of a classical 1950s Mother flies in on the opposite side of the stage.)

JAKE PUPPET:
But your mama thought there was somethin’ wrong
Didn’t want you sleeping with a boy too long
It’s a serious thing in a grown-up world
Maybe you’d be better with a Barbie girl

(a puppet GEORGIA bops onto the stage, possibly with balloons in her shirt for obvious reasons. the BILL PUPPET speaks to the JAKE puppet, gesturing to the GEORGIA puppet.)

BILL PUPPET:
You knew that I adored-ya
But you left me in Georgia
Toys are not sentimental
How could I be for rental?

(the Mother puppet slowly gets a costume change until it looks like APRIL.)
She’s the meanest hag that has ever been

(the APRIL puppet starts to beat on the BILL one, comically but tragically.)

Pulled out my insides with an old safety pin
I’m the sorest sight, now I feel like trash
Clothes are made of rags and they don’t even match

(there is a flutter as the APRIL puppet puts him in a tuxedo)

So she dressed me up as the man she loved
Threw me in a box when she had had enough
Now the light of day I no longer see
She stuck her voodoo pins where my eyes used to be

(she does so. the lights go out for a bit, and go back up as the BILL puppet is back in his original outfit, but rumpled and still with the pins in his eyes.)

Accidentally tragic
Victim of her black magic
Had a boy once who loved me

(the JAKE puppet fades into the spotlight…)

Now he’s so afraid of me

(and fades out. The APRIL puppet fades in.)

On a long lost day when you’re gray and dull
You’ll be there remembering your old toy boy
When your oldest son wonderin’ what to be

(a puppet version of MARY emerges from the shadows. Close-up on the puppet as she sings the final line.)
Tell him the story of a boy like me

(There’s some light vocalizing as the song comes to a cheerful close and all fades to black. We see lights back up on a rather shabby, dilapidated basement apartment. Hardly any lights are on and the opening of the front door is a knife of light into the corneas of the viewer. APRIL enters, a little haggard looking and her hair is obviously shorter than we saw it before, in the awkward stage of growing back. She takes a step inside and locks the door, constantly wearing a troubled look. She takes a few nervous steps down and calls out)

APRIL: Bill? Are you in? One of the boys gave me a key… I was talking to the oldest a few days ago, he said you’re not doing…well… are you here?

(there is a long pause, then a familiar voice.)

VOICE: He’s not in the kitchen.

(APRIL cocks an eyebrow, she is quite confused and continues to enter.)

APRIL: Bill? Is that you? Are you all right? I know we haven’t talked in months, but… I’d like to talk to you…about you, and me… about us… I wanted to say I’m sorry. I think I may have overreacted, I was under a lot of stress… Bill? Can you hear me?

VOICE: Bill can’t hear you.

(APRIL continues down a dark hallway.)

APRIL: Bill, I know that’s you. Stop screwing around, will you? Youre…

(she screams upon entering the kitchen, finding BILL at the stove. He is dressed like Mary: red flannel shirt, black jeans, and an ill-fitting blonde wig in a ponytail. He looks awful, complete with a formerly shorn face now adorned with a five o’clock shadow. He has possibly gained weight, his eyes are bloodshot, his face drawn. APRIL recoils as a melancholy string line picks up the next song. He tries to sing it sultry, like a cabaret maven…and it’s not pretty.)

There’s a girl, thought she knew,
What her life was going to do,
Then she goes, and falls in love and throws it all away.

(lounging back against a kitchen counter.)

But her man, can’t decide,
If he’s made the right choice in life,
So she comes home on day to find he’s gone away.

(on the offensive, as MARY would do, getting in APRIL’s face.)

Put your heart back in your pocket,
Pick your love up off the floor
When your momma says you’re stopping,
But girl, let me tell you more:
If he’s 95 or 22,
A boy’s gonna do what he’s gonna do,

(a little shimmy.)

He says he don’t love you anymore,
So pick up off the floor.

(walking around the room, posturing like a Bond villain, cocky and smug)

Walks around an empty town,
Sees his face coming around,
Every corner takes on a similar stay.

Love is lost, life can burn,
But your luck will return,
But if you’re dragging it down you won’t know it’s there

(back to antagonize APRIL.)

Put your heart back in your pocket,
Pick your love up off the floor
When your momma says you’re stopping,
But girl, let me tell you more:
If he’s 95 or 22,
A boy’s gonna do what he’s gonna do,
He says he don’t love you anymore,
So pick up off the floor.

(APRIL backs away out of fear and a little bit of revulsion as MARY launches into another chorus. By the time MARY is done, APRIL is at the foot of the stairs, crying.)

Put your heart back in your pocket,
Pick your love up off the floor
When your momma says you’re stopping,
But girl, let me tell you more:
If he’s 95 or 22,
A boy’s gonna do what he’s gonna do,
He says he don’t love you anymore,
So pick up off the floor.

(during the bridge, he backs her up the stairs and back to the door.)
Pick your love, love, love
Pick up off the floor

(he is dangerously close to her, and she is mortified.)
Put your heart back in your pocket,
Pick your love up off the floor
When your momma says you’re stopping
But girl let me tell you more
If he’s 95 or 22
A boy’s gonna do what he’s gonna do
He says he don’t love you anymore
So pick up off the floor

(The opening line to “We Are Golden,” which would be used as a common theme in the score, comes back yet again, but this time in a horrific minor. APRIL puts a hand over her face and quickly exits, leaving MARY feeling very pleased with herself. However, as the shot slowly creeps up to MARY’s face, we see the smugness drain and a look of shock and realization show. One solitary tear starts to creep down BILL’s face as the next scene fades in with a rush of a commercial airliner and some mariachi music. The scene fades to a nice little cabana near an airport, somewhere near all those places stupid teenagers go on Spring Break in Mexico. A text appears along the bottom of the screen, telling us that it is one year later. There’s a slow panorama of the bar: we see some normal, everyday people enjoying their vacation: parents with loud young children, newlyweds drinking and celebrating love, and the odd businessman at a “meeting.” There’s one customer sitting at a small table in the center of the place, head hung over a rocks glass. It’s BILL, dressed as a man again, now fully gray and haggard, looking fifty but nearing forty and drinking to try to make himself feel better. He’s thinner, but looks a lot more worn, as if he hasn’t stopped crying since the last scene. The camera floats away from him as a new arrival shows up in the bar, bags in tow: APRIL, now also graying and worried, but smiling with a resolve to have a good time. She takes a deep breath of the sea air and fully enters the bar, searching for a place to sit. Her eyes see BILL and she freezes on the spot. Then, gathering her courage, she hitches up her bags again and walks on over, putting on a happy face. All around is the general noise of bar patrons. BILL is busy peering into his now empty glass when she finds him.)

APRIL: (with no shortage of sadness) Bill?

(he looks up and blanches.)

BILL: …

APRIL: Hi, Bill… it’s been a while, mind if I sit here?

BILL: (coughing nervously) Of course.

(she sits. There’s a long pause after a waiter takes her order.)

APRIL: (trying to be chipper)
So, what are the odds, huh?

BILL: …

APRIL: Imagine, the two of us picking this same place for vacation!

BILL: (sourly) Jake told me to go here.

APRIL: Oh, and Georgia… er, what are your plans, then?

BILL: (after a sigh) Got a big settlement a few years back. Claimed discrimination with the school board. They paid me a boatload to keep me quiet… so I’m busy blowing it all. (he raises his glass with a bitter flourish)
You?

APRIL: (a nervous laugh) Just on vacation, that’s all.

(another pause. Her drink arrives.)

APRIL: (mustering her courage) I see you don’t…uh…

BILL: I went back to Dr. John. We got Mary all taken care of.

(he takes a small bottle of pills out of the breast pocket of his ironically cheerful Hawaiian shirt. He shakes them gruffly.)

BILL: Turns out my Momma didn’t raise me right.

APRIL: Ah. (horridly uncomfortable) How long were you…did you…

BILL: Few months… (he beckons the waiter for another) few months after… you saw me.
(pregnant pause)
Didn’t do much. Didn’t really leave the house, just…dressed like her, I guess.

APRIL: So, you didn’t go out, or…?

BILL: No. I’m still a man, April…just like I always was. Just a little less… confused.

(another pause before BILL bursts into tears. APRIL instinctively reaches for him. He accepts it.)

BILL: I thought I was a man, you know? Thought I was an adult, thought I had it all figured out: picket fence, two kids, a dog…

APRIL: And a wife…

BILL: Fuck. Yeah… but I was still a stupid little kid. I went all the way through college, through marriage, through forty-some-odd fucking years… and I was still a kid. I never grew up, I hid from everything… I just let myself be sweet little Billy Brown… and it tore me up inside. I didn’t even know it. I was living like my teenage self for thirty years! I never grew up! I made sure I was just perfect for everyone… everyone except myself. I never knew who the Hell I was because I never asked…and then, when I finally got a chance to look around and see what I failure I was, how I didn’t even know who was looking at me in the mirror, what do I do? A God-damned copout. Went and hid.

(he gets his second drink)

I’m ashamed of myself, April. I should have been able to handle things, but instead I created a monster in my own head who let me take the easy way out. I just figured “hey, I’ll go gay. That’ll be easier, that’ll be my identity. I mean, I keep seeing this girl everywhere, maybe that’s who I want to be!” Fucking pathetic. I was still hiding, still trying to live out my teenage dreams of an easy life, and I still didn’t know who I was!

(APRIL puts a hand on his and he stops shaking, though continues sniffing. She looks at him with a smile.)

APRIL: I always knew.

(BILL busts into sobs that are half laughter and half grief. He looks up into his ex-wife’s eyes with watery eyes of his own, grinning in spite of himself.)

BILL: Teenage dreams in a teenage circus… I thought I was the best, I had it all figured out. I was Golden. Hh. Lying to myself, making bad things seem good and good things seem bad… I convinced myself of… stupid things. Things a stupid kid would believe, and I HAD two kids!

(there’s another pause with BILL exceedingly tense. He’s waiting, desperately waiting for what APRIL has to say, as if she holds all the answers.)

APRIL: Oh, Billy Brown, you are a victim of the time.
(chuckling a little)
Jake was right…

BILL: I really don’t want to hear about Jake. How long after the divorce did he try to move in on you? Or were you too busy spending time with Georgia?

(the last sentence is said very suggestively, and the first is apparently bitter. APRIL bristles at first.)

APRIL: Don’t be an ass!

(BILL crumples.)

BILL: sorry.

(APRIL plays her fingertip around the rim of her drink, trying to find the right words.)

APRIL: Georgia and I… she tried. And Jake, well…

(she leans a little closer, and BILL is surprised by the sudden flush he feels to his cheeks as his heart starts to pound)

APRIL: He’s a better friend than you’ll ever know. And, like I was saying… he was right.

BILL: (completely cowed) How?

APRIL: He says you know too much.
(Bill scoffs)
Shut up! Cripes, Bill, I went to Oxford and you make ME feel like an idiot ninety-nine percent of the time! There’s so much that flies through your head on a daily basis, it’s a miracle you didn’t lose your marbles earlier. You know, a couple of hundred years ago, you would have been DaVinci, or Gallileo. You would have been Socrates, you know? And that’s the really sad part. In this day and age, is someone like you encouraged to keep thinking and learning? No! Get your job, get your family, and shut up. Pretty soon, we’ve got people…
(she pauses before finally saying it)
cross-dressing all over the place, just because they can’t find any other way to feel unique!
(she takes a beat to calm herself.)
Do you know why people ‘experiment’ Bill? Do you know why they think they’re gay in college, and then regret it later? They weren’t allowed to do this or that, so if you’re gay, they think, you can get away with it.
(she seems him hang his head and she reaches again for his shoulder)

BILL: We were both trying to find love, weren’t we?

APRIL: (stopped in her tracks)
…I suppose so.

BILL: Because we didn’t love ourselves. There had always been someone, something there to make it feel like there was love…
(he gives a hard laugh)
Ha… it would have been easier if we actually WERE… gay, huh?

APRIL: (almost dreamily) Yeah… but you can’t be something you’re not, no matter how hard you might want it.

(he gets up, still crying and grinning. He walks on over to her and makes her stand up. She’s shocked as he takes her by both shoulders and stares directly into her eyes.)

BILL: I don’t know if I love you, April. I never loved myself.

APRIL: That’s okay, Bill… neither did I.

BILL: (looking deep into her eyes) Can we do this?

APRIL: I think we can try. We’ve both got our problems.

BILL: Uh-huh…

APRIL: And it might not even be love…

BILL: Uh-huh…

APRIL: But we can be ourselves now, right?

BILL: (smiling broadly) Right.

(they embrace as the crowd noise grows larger, until a plinky honky-tonk piano cuts through the noise. We cut to the piano on the far side of the bar, and suddenly JAKE is banging out a happy tune, with GEORGIA leaning on the piano next to him. Both have their bags packed at their side as well. Willing conspirators, the both of them.)

JAKE: (hamming it up on the ivories)
Isn’t it enough
isn’t it enough just to be wild and free
Caught up in the rough, caught up in the rush of life staring at me

(pointing at BILL)
You think you’re in love boy, but you don’t really know what love is

(to APRIL)
You think you’re in love girl, but honey let me show you where your heart is

Loverboy, is just illusion to me
You could take any boy, I’d show you what you would feel
Pretty boy with a nasty trace
Funny boy will an ugly face

Love is just a cautionary, momentary, reactionary lie
Love is just a cautionary, momentary, reactionary lie

(GEORGIA starts singing directly into the camera, sweetly and genuinely, if a little airheaded)

GEORGIA:
Isn’t it enough isn’t it enough just to be sunny and dumb
Aren’t you tired of hookin’ up, sick of breaking up
Oh you fool, you did it for fun

(She turns to the two in the middle of the lounge room)

You think you’re in love girl, but you don’t really know what love is
You think you’re in love boy, but honey let me show you where your heart is

(She leans on the piano, none too lasciviously, as they start the chorus. BILL and APRIL, meanwhile, look back and forth at each other, flabbergasted. JAKE and GEORGIA share a grin.)

JAKE & GEORGIA:
Loverboy, is just illusion to me
You could take any boy, I’d show you what you would feel
Pretty boy with a nasty trace
Funny boy will an ugly face

Love is just a cautionary, momentary, reactionary lie

(they share a duet on the piano for the next chorus.)

JAKE & GEORGIA:
Loverboy, is just illusion to me
You could take any boy, I’d show you what you would feel
Pretty boy with a nasty trace
Funny boy will an ugly face

Love is just a cautionary, momentary, reactionary lie
Love is just a cautionary, momentary, ractionary lie

(the house band picks up the tune and plays some old-timey variations on the theme. GEORGIA takes this opportunity to bust out some early 20th century dance moves, allowing BILL and APRIL to laugh and effectively break the ice. The entire lounge seems to take up the next chorus. Not a single soul is wearing red flannel.)

Loverboy, is just illusion to me
You could take any boy, I’d show you what you would feel
Pretty boy with a nasty trace
Funny boy will an ugly face

BILL: (to APRIL)
Love is just a cautionary, momentary, reactionary lie

APRIL: (to BILL, winking)
Love is just a cautionary, momentary, reactionary lie

(the two meet together, having the lights dim just before they kiss…maybe. One last spot is left on GEORGIA and JAKE at the piano as JAKE brings the show to an end with one last line.)

JAKE:
Love is just a cautionary, momentary, reactionary lie…

(He hams it up, singing to GEORGIA in an attempt to impress her. She rebukes him good-naturedly with a grin, putting her hand over his approaching face and gently pushing him away as the last note is struck on the piano. Lights out. End.)

www.lala.com/#album/432627041169198490/Mika/The_Boy_Who_Knew_Too_Much

Mweh?


(Now we see the bar again. GEORGIA and APRIL have actually managed to infiltrate without the latter having a panic attack. They are having drinks, “girly” drinks, chatting it up and being very friendly in the background. The camera pulls back to see JAKE and BILL in the foreground, both displeased with the situation. We can still hear them laughing and giggling over the ambient bar noise; the boys are remaining silent. They cast angry looks at the girls, then back at each other, as if to say “huh, women!” or something to that effect. JAKE makes a rude gesture, hinting at a possible “relationship” between the two ladies, and BILL loses it. We do not see his eyes close. It should be noted that the BLONDE is tending bar. BILL shoots up from the table, knocking it over and roaring out a challenge as the song begins with percussive, accusing piano.)

BILL:

You think you’re better, you’re better than me?!
You blow me off as history
To avoid conversation
You’re ignoring me

(APRIL, startled, bolts from her chair and streaks out of the bar. The BLONDE, meanwhile, gets the patrons to start a bit of a drone underneath the song. BILL, seizing the opportunity, saunters over to a flabbergasted GEORGIA and starts pouring on a slightly liquored up charm.)


When you’ve had enough and
you need somebody to know
Well you’re looking tough

But you need a way to let it go
Come on now
what’s a boy s’posed to do
When I can’t seem to leave you alone
Touching me touching you

I wanna be your brother,
wanna be your father too
Never make you run for cover

even if they want us to
I wanna be your sister,
wanna be your mother too
I wanna be wanna be
Whatever else that touches you (x3)

(GEORGIA is not having any of it. She leaves as well, with BILL grinning callously and shouting after her.)


For fear of losing, losing your way
just stop and listen to the things that they say
To avoid confrontation
you walk away

(he turns back to the rest of the bar, full proclaiming that he’s, well, lost his ability to care.)


Growing up, found the need to compromise
Well I’ve had enough 20 years and I realized
Come on now, what’s a boy s’posed to do
When I can’t seem to leave you alone
Touching me touching you

(We see him slide across the floor and sing the next chorus… to JAKE.)


I wanna be your brother,
wanna be your father too
Never make you run for
cover even if they want us to
I wanna be your sister,
wanna be your mother too
I wanna be wanna be
Whatever else that touches you (x3)

(JAKE gets upset, disgusted, and leaves. The patrons keep on underneath the music as BILL makes the rounds, hitting on pretty much everything he sees.)


When you’ve had enough and you need somebody to know
Well you’re looking tough but you need a way to let it go
Come on now, what’s a boy s’posed to do
When I can’t seem to leave you alone
Touching me touching you

(the song suddenly grinds to a halt, traintracks as we see the BLONDE from behind the bar interjects her own song, leaping up onto the bar and, well, pulling a Coyote Ugly. BILL doesn’t seem to be aware of this, as he continues with the bride to his song and the final choruses. They happen simultaneously.)

BLONDE:

Everybody’s gonna love today,

Gonna love today, gonna love today

Everybody’s gonna love today, love today,

Anyway you want to, anyway you’ve got to,

Love love me, love love me, love love…

Girl with a groove with the big bust on,

Big bust on, big bust on.

Wait till your mother and your papa’s gone,

Papa’s gone.

Momma, Momma, Papa, shock shock me,

Shock shock me, Shock shock…

BILL:
This isn’t a perfect love
One that we’re guilty of
What am I supposed to do
Can’t seem to leave you alone
Touching me Touching you

I wanna be your brother,
wanna be your father too
Never make you run for
cover even if they want us to
I wanna be your sister,
wanna be your mother too
I wanna be wanna be
Whatever else that touches…

(BILL finally sees the BLONDE, and the song dissolves, along with the entire bar scene. We hear what sounds like the rush of tides, but it turns out to be the rush of wind through the window of BILL’s bedroom back in his house. The entire previous scene appears to be a dream. It’s apparent that APRIL has been here lately, as almost everything of note has been boxed up and taken. The bed is bare, except for a passed out BILL. Several bottles of liquor stand on a milk crate next to the bed. Most surprisingly, however, are the BLONDE and the YOUNG BILL that was originally seen in the opening, singing the backup bits to the next song in a hushed, worried whisper.)

BLONDE ANDBOY:

Don’t wake up, won’t wake up, can’t wake up,
No, don’t wake me up
don’t wake up, won’t wake up, can’t wake up,
No, don’t wake me up

BILL: (drowsy, half asleep, mourning. He’s still lying on the bed. He glances at the clock.)
It’s the early morn
(turns on the light)

lights flick on
sleepy eyes peek through the
blinds at something wrong
(does so. He sees his reflection in a nearby window, almost transparent.)

Motionless remains the mess
Shame, such a beautiful, beautiful young life

(he rolls over onto his back)
By the time  I’m dreaming
and you’ve crept out on me sleeping
I’m busy in the blissful unaware
By the time I’m dreaming
and you’ve crept out on me sleeping
tell me how am I supposed to care

BLONDE & BOY:
Don’t wake up, won’t wake up, can’t wake up,
no, don’t wake me up
don’t wake up, won’t wake up, can’t wake up,
no, don’t wake me up

(BILL rolls over again and sees some of the flotsam left from APRIL’s hurried packing. A bunch of old baby clothes are strewn about, as if she couldn’t decide if she should take them or not.)

BILL:
A trail of clothes two years old
Why did you have to go and leave
all this stuff behind
wasn’t I allowed three strikes and out
No, but you said I could, said
I could just one night

(he pulls himself up to a seated position on the bed, but it’s apparent he really doesn’t want to do anything.)


By the time I’m dreaming
and you’ve crept out on me sleeping
I’m busy in the blissful unaware
By the time I’m dreaming
and you’ve crept out on me sleeping
tell me how am I supposed to care

(he’s very clearly crying now, his tears reflecting in the streetlight streaming in the window like ersatz moonlight. More involved background parts.)

If I had let you go, let you go

BLONDE ANDBOY:

sounds like Would

BILL:
would this be different, different
Now I’ll never know never know
I didn’t get the chance damn you
If I let had you go, let you go
would this be different, different
Now I’ll never know never know
I didn’t get the chance damn you

(three part unison.)
And by the time I’m dreaming
and you’ve crept out on me sleeping
I’m busy in the blissful unaware
And by the time I’m dreaming
and you’ve crept out on me sleeping
tell me how am I supposed to care
(the BLONDE and the BOY fade the song out. As they do so, BILL blinks hard, turns around slowly and, for the first time, sees the BLONDE in reality.)


Don’t wake up, won’t wake up, can’t wake up,
no, don’t wake me up
don’t wake up, won’t wake up, can’t wake up,
no, don’t wake me up
don’t wake up, won’t wake up, can’t wake up,
no, don’t wake me up
don’t wake up, won’t wake up, can’t wake up,
no, don’t wake me up
don’t wake up, won’t wake up, can’t wake up…

BILL: (almost aghast, but mostly curious)

Who are you?

(the BLONDE smiles.)

BLONDE: You know who I am?

BILL: Are you… me?

BLONDE: Not yet.

BILL: Why are you… why am I… I think… I do… Do I want…?

BLONDE: You’ll just have to find that out…

(the BOY, who has been standing very nervously in the corner, finally speaks up.)

BOY: Be careful! You don’t have to…

(he quails under a glare from the BLONDE. She turns back to BILL, and smiles.)

BLONDE: We’ll meet again, BILL. My name’s Mary.

(she sticks out a hand to shake his. He makes to do so, but the instant before contact we are blinded as BILL snaps into morning, his alarm clock juddering him awake with the force of a neutron bomb. Was he dreaming? Did he fall back asleep until then? Was it real? He is asking himself the same thing.

KING SIZE update!

Here’s all the latest music:

(We see BILL and JAKE, back at the bar. BILL’s looking a little worse for wear: his clothes are still nice, but noticeably more rumpled. Less pride is put into his appearance. JAKE, unflappable as ever, is still in his red and gray striped sweater.)

JAKE: Women!

BILL: Yeah.

JAKE: She didn’t even say anything?

BILL: Not to me. She laid everything out with the guy, got it all figured out. She’s getting most of it, of course…

JAKE: Did you claim any fault?

BILL: I think we’re calling it “irreconcilable difficulties.”

JAKE: Bull!
(puts down the beer he’s chugging.)
You don’t have to do this, Bill! You’re gettin’ taken for a ride, you can’t just let her walk all over you!

BILL: I’m not so sure, Jake… she says I’ve been really distant, and to tell the truth I have been spacing out lately…

JAKE: You’ve always been like that, dumbass. I can’t remember a day back when we were kids that you didn’t get busted daydreaming.

BILL: But… I thought I was done with that, when we got married…

JAKE: Jeez, you’re dense.
(beckons for another round.)
You’re buying. Let me tell you something, Billy: if you felt like you had to fundamentally change who you were to marry someone, then you shouldn’t have married that person.

BILL: (a little annoyed) Because you have plenty of experience, I suppose?

JAKE: Why do you think I don’t get married? No woman on Earth’s ready for this!

BILL: (ignoring him) Besides, April made me feel good…happy, even.

JAKE: Well, does she make you happy right now?

BILL: …no…

JAKE: Well, good riddance.
(the waitress arrives with new beers. JAKE is elated.)
and Mazel Tov!

BILL: Jake, how can you say that?

JAKE: What? Just because I’m not Jewish?

BILL: Don’t be an ass. I meant about April. I thought you two were friends.

JAKE: Well, pal, the lines got drawn as soon as the split happened, and I suddenly wound up as persona non grata in her camp. You wouldn’t believe who she’s been talking to, lately…

BILL: Who?

(JAKE is far too busy drinking.)

BILL: (stronger) Who?

(at that moment, we see APRIL walk into the bar, almost being pushed from behind. She stumbles in, scowling, and is followed by a tell, leggy blonde knockout, nearing middle age but still very vivacious. She wears the sort of outfit she should have stopped wearing fifteen years ago, but no one is going to complain about. APRIL catches sight of BILL and freezes, BILL does a similar thing at the table. Both JAKE and the FRIEND try to force the two to deal with the situation, the usual “show them you’re not missing them” schtick. Neither BILL nor APRIL seem into it, and balk excessively, frozen and bordering on nausea. Finally, with a grumble, the FRIEND shoos her back out. BILL is still at the table, thunderstruck, as if he’s seen a ghost.)
BILL: …Georgia?

JAKE: (draining another beer) Holee shit, Georgia! I told you she wouldn’t believe it, Billy-boy! It looks like your two solitary conquests have joined forces to smite you! Hahahaha, you should see your freakin’ face!

(we cut to outside the bar where APRIL is trying, unsuccessfully, to escape. GEORGIA, it seems, has a bit of a…weight advantage on her, if only in her blouse.)

GEORGIA: April! Damn it all… would you stop?!

APRIL: I can’t go in there! I’m not ready!

GEORGIA: What do you mean, ‘you’re not ready?’ It was you’re idea in the first place!

APRIL: I know, but…

GEORGIA: I barely know you, girl! You call me up outta nowhere, and I come all the way from downtown to help. You say you’re having trouble with Bill, and I know trouble with Bill, but the minute I get there you go bananas and say you wanna go down to the bar. Ya know, to rub it in his face. And then, April, after I cart my tuchas down here, along with your bony butt…you ditch!

APRIL: I just…I guess I’m not ready, or something… will you let me go?

GEORGIA: (holding her in a bearhug, looking her square in the eye) You promise not to bail?

APRIL: (a little uncomfortable being put to the squeeze)
Promise.

(he lets her go and, gasping, she takes a few steps away, but holds firm. GEORGIA crosses her arms triumphantly.)

GEORGIA: Good. Didn’t feel like runnin’ ya down, anyway.
(she leans against the brick wall of the building adjacent to the bar.)

So what’s up?

APRIL: I don’t know, all right? I was all ready to be angry at him, you know, really pissed… but I saw his face, and he looked so sad, and I…

GEORGIA: I bet you just wanted to snuggle up and make all his problems go away, eh?

APRIL: (ashamed)
…yeah…

GEORGIA: (ruffling her short, brown hair with a giggle.)
I don’t blame ya. He’s still a cute little goober. I just couldn’t deal with him all the time. I see him, and yeah he’s all right… but then I remember stuff, and it ain’t so good. How bout you? When you see him, what do you see?

(the camera slowly tucks in around APRIL’s face as she battles her emotions: love, hate, frustration, adoration, sadness, hope, and so on. GEORGIA sends up another round of giggles.)

GEORGIA: You look confused, darling. Why?
(she starts to trail her fingers along APRIL’s face, down to her collarbone.)
Need any help… convincing yourself?

(APRIL slaps her hand away.)

APRIL: Knock it off.

(GEORGIA laughs, heartily, and links arms with her. APRIL has nowhere to run.)

GEORGIA: C’mon, Ape… I’ll go get you a drink someplace else…
(a bouncy beat seems to start up out of nowhere, and GEORGIA begins a saucy, semi-Latin tune. APRIL casts nervous glances about, wondering just what in the Hell is going on. No one else seems to notice, and in fact the entire street scene seems to start moving to the beat: car horns, footfalls, traffic lights, even the pickle-bucket-drummer on the street.)

GEORGIA: (really playing it up)

Your heart is broken
To your surprise
You’re sick of crying
For blue eyes

(she dots APRIL on the nose, and we can clearly see that both of their eyes are brown. However, we’ve seen several times that BILL’s are, indeed, blue.)

So tired of living
Misunderstood
Think hard woman
I think you should

(this is drawn out, with GEORGIA being just a tiny bit touchy-feely before she hits the punchline in the next word.)

Come, sorrow is so peculiar

(she shrugs.)

It comes in a day, then it’ll never leave you

(APRIL starts to, frankly, freak out. She begins to dig in her purse to calm herself down, but GEORGIA stops her, placing hands on hers, still singing.)

You take a pill, wonder if it will fix you
They wonder why sorrow has never left you

(the melancholic last few lines blow away as the chorus kicks in, with GEORGIA doing an ersatz flamenco with the street drummer. She can’t exactly hike up her miniskirt, but she tries. The drummer doubles her part.)

I’m talkin’ bout blue eyes, blue eyes
What’s the matter, matter
Blue eyes, blue eyes
What’s the matter matter
so blind, so blind
What’s the matter, matter
Blue eyes, blue eyes
What’s the matter with you?

(she saunters over and faints melodramatrically into APRIL’s arms.)

Ohh, you’ll wind up broken
At the end of the round
Won’t find your spirit
In a lost and found

(she bounces back up, looking directly into APRIL’s eyes. GEORGIA doesn’t have much concept of personal space.)

Oh I’ve been watching
How you behave
Not much like a lover

(she grabs her in a tight embrace. APRIL stiffens.)

More like a slave

(she proceeds to “whip” APRIL across the bottom with a sharp slap. APRIL recoils in horror and shock, but GEORGIA beckons her closer with fingers curling.)

Come, sorrow is so peculiar
It comes in a day, then it’ll never leave you
You take a pill, wonder if it will fix you
They wonder why sorrow has never left you

(she drags APRIL over by the drummer and tries to teach her a few steps. APRIL grudgingly begins to follow along, but is secretly enjoying the freedom of being silly.)

I’m talkin’ bout blue eyes, blue eyes
What’s the matter, matter
Blue eyes, blue eyes
What’s the matter matter
so blind, so blind
What’s the matter, matter
Blue eyes, blue eyes
What’s the matter with…

(APRIL starts to triple the part, along with GEORGIA and the drummer.)
Blue eyes, blue eyes
What’s the matter matter
Blue eyes, blue eyes
What’s the matter matter
so blind, so blind
What’s the matter, matter

(they dance. You know, how people dance during songs like this.)

Blue eyes, blue eyes
What’s the matter with you?
What’s the matter with you?
What’s the matter with you

(The song ends as GEORGIA bends APRIL down into a graceful dip, then pulls her back upright and plants a massive kiss on her lips. APRIL’s eyes pop open and nearly pop out of her head. We have the frame freeze right there and go to black and white, while we zoom out to see that frame on a chalkboard, with BILL in a labcoat, big glasses, and wooden pointer playing the professor. He gestures at the board as the next song begins.)

Could you believe the same old story
Yeah, it never bores me, though I’ve heard it all before

(he draws a circle around GEORGIA’s face, still pressed to APRIL’s)

Her name was Georgia and she was gorgeous
When she adored ya the whole room would get to know

(the camera crashes into the chalkboard, which becomes sort of a portal into the past, and a hospital years ago. We can see a teenaged GEORGIA clad in breezy pink, literally bouncing down the hall, both the curls in her hair and the… well, you know. Almost every man in the hallway stops to gawk as she makes her way to a particular room.)

Like a movie that was filled with lust
Coming at you with a double D bust

(we see her walk into the room, where a young BILL is laying on a bed, leg in a sling, still wearing a jersey. She hands him a little box of candies and kisses him right on the lips.)

At the bed of a wounded soldier
In a rush cause she’s getting older

(indeed, we see in a rush her getting older, doing what the song says. A few more years into high school, and BILL is obviously nervous and looking particularly underage at the bar whilst GEORGIA tries to get him to join in the merriment.)

Hanging out in the fancy bars
With the boys who can play guitar
Listen up, cause I’ve got to warn ya
She’s gonna make it out in California

(we come back to BILL in the empty black room, dressed as the professor with the goofy glasses. He’s half lamenting, half rhapsodizing. The board now shows the closeup picture of GEORGIA from the hospital hallway. He’s obvious singing the praises of GEORGIA, taking time to touch the board thoughtfully and bemoan what has happened.)

Hey you, what’s a good girl like you
Doing in this crazy world
Where’s the good gone girl
Dance, dance to the life you wanted
When you were only seventeen
With your good girl dream

Ooooo….good gone girl

(we have a shot of BILL in profile, which he jerks his head sideways in music video fashion so he is looking to the side, directly into the camera for the “could you believe” segment. After that, we see that APRIL’s picture is now on the board, but it’s the picture of her from the divorce meeting, cold and stoic. BILL’s tone is now sardonic, mocking, clearly upset with the way she’s treated him.)

Could you believe, the same old phonies
Those painted ponies, that you’ve ridden all before

(he makes the appropriately vulgar action for that last line)

Her name was April, but she was hateful
Enough to make you want to run right out the door

(a stinging indictment of his soon-to-be ex-wife, accusing her of only wanting a steady husband with money. A full length picture of APRIL appears on the board, and is progressively dressed with a gown, pearls, and other opulence.)

I can tell you what you want the most
Hanging out for the champagne toast
When the end of the night gets tricky
Don’t you know that beggars can’t be picky
Looking out for a man who’s golden
Doesn’t matter if he’s old, he’s rolling
Coming at you like a desperate hunter
Sugar daddy, he’s just a munter

(this time, we can see APRIL in the gown, black and white, dancing at some society ball, but this time BILL’s voice is coming from several rich old men at the ball, catcalling as she walks by. Oddly, we can see BILL arm in arm with APRIL, though silent and looking wholly uncomfortable.)

Hey you, what’s a good girl like you
Doing in this crazy world
Where’s the good gone girl
Dance, dance to the life you wanted
When you were only seventeen
With your good girl dream

(cut back to BILL in the thick glasses, fairly shouting at the picture on the board, which features APRIL in her finery, sporting a distasteful glance at the men.)

Hey you, what’s a good girl like you
Doing in this crazy world
Where’s the good gone girl
Dance, dance to the life you wanted
When you were only seventeen
With your good girl dream

Ooooo….good gone girl

(as he’s going through all these “oooooo’s” we see the BLONDE, flannel clad, ponytail, just as mysterious as before, walk out from behind the board. Her words fill under the falsetto vamping from BILL)

BLONDE:
She’s walking around all over town
Needs somebody to notice, but the goodness gets her down
She’s happy to choose somebody to use
Good gone girl she’s got nothing left to loose

(the BLONDE moves into position behind BILL, who is looking straight out and up to the sky, bemoaning the situation. He has yet to see the BLONDE face to face.)

She’s walking around all over town
Needs somebody to notice, but the goodness gets her down
She’s happy to choose somebody to use
Good gone girl she’s got nothing left to loose

(at the last repetition, we see the BLONDE standing behind BILL, whispering in his ear. There’s a closeup on her painted lips…odd for someone dressed so casually.)

She’s walking around all over town
Needs somebody to notice, but the goodness gets her down
She’s happy to choose somebody to use
Good gone girl she’s got nothing left to loose

(the song fades out as we swirl back into reality, with BILL being shot from above, back on the psychiatrist’s couch. He blinks, as if coming out of a sleep, and immediately becomes ashamed.)

BILL: Shit.

DR. JOHN: (from his desk across the office.) Welcome back, Bill.

BILL: Sorry, doctor… I did it again…

DR. JOHN: It’s all right, we’ll get that under control eventually. For now, I’d like to talk about what I heard. Who is this Georgia? You haven’t mentioned her before.

(BILL lets out an audible sigh, a long and painful one.)

DR. JOHN: Bill…

(BILL actually audibly groans from the couch.)

You’ve got to tell me these things, or I can’t help you.

BILL: Okay… (another sigh)
You know how every person has that one relationship from when they were younger that they regret?

DR. JOHN: (after a thoughtful pause) I suppose.

BILL: Well, that’s Georgia: Tall, blonde, and with a body that could stop traffic halfway around the world.

DR. JOHN: And this was a… problem?

BILL: No! Well…not that, anyway… we met in high school. She was a cheerleader, the whole time I was wondering “what does she want with me?” y’know? She actively pursued me, and let me tell you, when Georgia actively pursues someone, it’s… active.

DR. JOHN: (raising his eyebrows) Hmm?

BILL: She doesn’t really take no for an answer.

(a slightly uncomfortable pause.)

DR. JOHN: Was the relationship…sexual?

(we can see BILL visibly crumple into the upholstery.)

BILL: (mousey) Yes.

DR. JOHN: And you never quite thought you were… deserving of a woman with her… qualifications?

BILL: (with a wry chuckle) You could call it that. High school cred, if you know what I mean.

DR. JOHN: I think I do.

BILL: I mean, it was ridiculous! Girls like her date the stars, not the backups! You know what I mean, right? Didn’t you play sports in high school?

DR. JOHN: I played tennis.

BILL: (stopped dead in his tracks) Really?

DR. JOHN: (leveling his brow) Really.

BILL: Wow.

DR. JOHN: (a little peeved.) Remember, Mr. Brown, you’re paying for us to talk about you. Now, when it came to this Georgia…

BILL: Something about it just didn’t add up.

DR. JOHN: And that’s why you broke it off?

BILL: …not exactly.

(another pregnant pause.)

DR. JOHN: Well?

BILL: (groaning) Do you really need to know?

DR. JOHN: It’s my job, Bill.

BILL: Okay!
(he musters his courage)
…she liked to like girls.

DR. JOHN: Pardon?

BILL: She swung both ways, all right?

DR. JOHN: I see. And this bothered you?

BILL: Well…yeah! Something about it just isn’t…right!

DR. JOHN: I see.

BILL: Stop saying that.

DR. JOHN: (with a slightly sadistic smile) Sorry. So, you broke up with her?

BILL: Not that she’d really listen to me. Took me halfway through college and a bunch of unanswered phone calls for her to finally give up the ghost. Hell, she was still calling me when I got engaged!

DR. JOHN: To April?

BILL: (crumpling again) Yes… to April.

DR. JOHN: And you just saw her, didn’t you? At the bar?

(BILL sits in stony silence. DR. JOHN tries again.)

DR. JOHN: How do you feel about April?

BILL: I’m not ready to talk about that.

DR. JOHN: Just as well, I suppose. Our time’s almost up for the day. I look forward to seeing you next week.

BILL: (a bit distracted. He notices he’s been sweating.)
Yeah, sure…

(The camera follows him as he walks out of the office, shaking his head and muttering.)

I need a drink.

Backdate ho!



–>


(the scene goes directly from BILL’s troubled face into the next song, to be as much of a crash from the lighthearted “Dr. John” as possible. We have a gentle dissolve to the office of the divorce arbiter, a shot of the door as it’s opened from the other side. In walks BILL and APRIL, beckoned in by an assistant. As the piano begins, we see them both shake hands with the man presiding over the divorce, then head to separate chairs in front of a desk. Their eyes meet for a moment: BILL’s plead, but APRIL’s are hard and expressionless. It’s just been too much, too long. They move to sit and the office seems to cool, being covered in varied hues of blue. Ghostly, spiritual projections of themselves, more or less, sprout from their backs and stand behind the two chairs, glaring each other down. BILL’s spirit begins the song.)

BILL: (pleading, desperate for reconciliation)

I’m standing across from you
And dreaming of the things i do
I don’t speak you don’t know me at all


APRIL: (giving her reasons for pushing ahead)

For fear of what you might do
I say nothing but stare at you
And i’m dreaming
I’m trippin’ over you

(BILL finally breaks the glare and his spirit walks away to the other side of the office. As this is happening, we can see the entire proceedings going on behind them in realtime, but silent.)

BILL:

Truth be told
My problems solved
You mean the world to be but you’ll never know
You could be cruel to me
While we’re risking the way that i see you

(he turns to APRIL, tears in his eyes)

That i see you (3x)
That i see…

(APRIL picks up the song, still cold and trying not to get involved, but suffering in spite of herself. She turns away this time)

Conversations
Not me at all
I’m hesitating
Only to fall
And i’m waiting i’m hating everyone

BILL; (with a great deal of hope)

Could it be you fell for me?
And any possible similarity
If its all how would i know?

APRIL: (she rounds on him, a little vindictive, arms crossed)

You never knew me at all but i see you

UNISON:

But i see you (4x)

(At this point, BILL continues with the “I see you’s” while APRIL takes the melody lines. The two spirits walk closer to each other, one tiny little step on each beat, their hands outstretched.)

I’m standing across from you (but i see you)
I’ve dreamt alone now the dreams won’t do (but i see you)
I’m standing across from you (but i see you)
I’ve dreamt alone now the dreams won’t do (but i see you)

(Just as they are about to touch, we see, in real life, the arbiter slam a book shut. The meeting is over. BILL’s spirit explodes in a blast of vapor, broken. We can see, though still silent, the BILL in real life break down and start to cry. APRIL’s spirit, still standing behind her, sings quietly, softly.)

APRIL:

Truth be told my problem solved
You mean the world to me
But you’ll never know
You could be cruel to me
While we’re risking the way that i see you
But i see you (4x)

(She begins the melody lines again, and we see, just a glimpse of it, some of the vapor from BILL shimmer into being again…except this time… it’s in the form of the young lady who had conducted the choir during “We Are Golden.” Black jeans, red flannel shirt, blonde ponytail. APRIL’s spirit regards her with a mix of horror, curiosity and wonder.)

I’m standing across from you (but i see you)
I’ve dreamt alone now the dreams won’t do (but i see you)
(4x)

APRIL:

But i see you

BLONDE:
But i see you

APRIL:

But i see you…

(spoken)

Who are you?

(But the moment she speaks to the blonde, it too vanishes. The blue filter that has been cast over the entire proceedings fades as we cut back to BILL, still hunched over in the chair. APRIL leaves without an extra word, and the arbiter is doing his best to console him. Was it a dream? Was it what they were really thinking, really feeling? I guess we’ll have to see.)

Nuuuuuuuuu…

(We still see BILL, standing in the rain, completely flabbergasted. The screen fades to black and we hear a voice out of the darkness, a voice we haven’t heard before.)

VOICE: You’re filing for divorce, then?

(The scene lights back up to see BILL, filmed from above, sitting on a psychiatrists’ couch. He looks troubled, to say the least.)

BILL: She is. (he sighs)

VOICE: And did she ask you to come and see me?

BILL: (shaking his head) No. That was my own decision. Something’s gone wrong, lately… it’s like my brain’s running away with itself… I want to learn how to fight it, or stop it, or something.

VOICE: And you’ve made very good progress.

(the camera swings out to see the DOCTOR sitting at his desk, fingers steepled, very scholarly. He’s well dressed in shirt, tie, and vest, although he looks almost too young to be a full-fledged shrink. If possible, this would be a wonderful cameo for the artist behind this music. The scene switches back and forth between medium shots of the DOC at the desk and BILL on the couch, but not back to the original overhead shot…yet)

DR: It’s only been a short while, but you’ve gotten quite calm. You seem to be doing a little better at work, and you tell me you’re sleeping better. I’m very proud of you.

BILL: (a little sheepish) Thank you.

DR: Now, tell me how you feel about the upcoming divorce.

(a beat. The camera goes back to over BILL’s face. He takes a deep breath.)

BILL: I…I just don’t know what happened. I mean, I’m married, two kids in college, wife, dog, suburban home… everything I could want!

(he pauses. What is this, a commercial?)

DR: Go on…

BILL: This sounds so stupid, but… it all happened so fast. It really did. One day, I go into work, and all I can see are these little brats with their self-important sneers and their backtalk… it’s just not what I remembered when I started teaching, and before I know it… I just don’t feel like I’m doing anything anymore. No one listens, no one cares…what am I doing? I go home, and I feel like crap, and I don’t want to bug April about it, but still, it eats at me… I guess more than I thought.

DR: So you started retreating. You felt like no one was listening, like things didn’t mean anything…so you created a world where things were big and loud, where someone listened… where everything ties up nice with a song?

BILL: I guess so… God, it feels so lame!

DR: It happens, it happens, Bill. Don’t be worried. Keep talking.

BILL: I don’t want to. I feel like a friggen TV drama. I feel like a loser.

DR: Bill, you’ve got to tell me more so we can help this. Lots of people have these same problems, you’re not alone.

BILL: But I should be able to fix this on my own. I just… I’ve just got to stop thinking so much.

DR: There’s nothing wrong with thinking, Bill. We’ve just got to change what you think about. Tell me what you think about.

(an uncomfortable silence follows.)

DR: Bill…just close your eyes… and tell me what you think about…

(BILL shuts his eyes angrily, screwing them up tight. The camera zooms in on his eyes and we hear him sing a few bars a capella.)

BILL: I look for joy in a strange place…

(His eyes are jolted open by the DOCTOR interrupting him)

DR: Bill, we talked about this…you’ve got to stop retreating like that, it won’t-

BILL: (cutting him off) If you want me to tell you, then listen!

(there’s a another frustrated silence. Finally, the DOCTOR leans back in his chairs and steeples his fingers again.)

DR: Very well. Proceed.

(the camera goes back to the extreme closeup on his eyes. He closes them and we are transformed to an overexposed version of the DOCTOR’S office. He begins to sing in another fantasy sequence, from the couch.)

BILL:
I look for joy in a strange place
From the back of the bar
From afar
I see the look on my mama’s face
When her son’s in the
corner, undone

(he sits up, clutching a pillow, and the camera follows, cutting to the foot of the couch.)

She says that my life is over
"Boy, you don’t know
what you got till
it’s gone"

(he mimes the following on the pillow he holds)

"Come put your head
upon my shoulder"
She gave me her hand,
but I ignored her

(he leaps out of the chair and begins to dance around the office. Surprisingly, the busts on the DOCTOR’s desk begin to sing backup: Freud, and the Phrenology head, in perfect harmony, all while lights dazzle in the office window.)

Oh, Dr. John
What am I doing
What am I doing I wrong?
Cuz I keep on trying
Something ain’t going
Something ain’t going on
Oh, Dr. John

(he turns to the DOCTOR, addressing him)

I look for joy in a strange place
From the back of a bar
From afar
I see the look on my daddy’s face
When his son’s
falling over, undone

(he turns away, walking to the far corner of the office, tears brimming in his eyes)

Father my life is over
Well I didn’t know what I
had now it’s gone
Can I lay my head upon
your shoulder?

(he produces a gun from apparently nowhere and holds it to his temple, appealing to the heavens)

If I fall asleep,
will it be over?

(the gun dissolves into fingers to his head, he acts surprised for a split second before appealing to the heavens again. The busts hop off the desk and over to his feet on the floor, once again harmonizing on the chorus)

Oh, Dr. John
What am I doing
What am I doing I wrong?
Cuz I keep on trying
Something ain’t going
Something ain’t going on

(he picks up the busts and they begin to prance about the office, singing to the DOCTOR)

Oh, Dr. John
What am I doing
What am I doing I wrong?
Cuz I keep on trying
Something ain’t going
Something ain’t going on

(He puts the busts back on the desk, and seems to relax a bit, turning his face from a mask of worry into a little more begrudging happiness, enjoying the show. He gets closer and closer to the young, handsome DOCTOR… a little too close. He’s in the DOCTOR’s lap, twiddling fingers in his face.)

They say I’m a big heartbreaker
But Doctor, I’d never hurt ya
It isn’t that obvious?

(With a little kick, he hops off the DOCTOR’s lap and heads back around the office, singing to the bookshelves and whatnot. We see the busts joining in again in the background. Background vocals are in brackets, and flower petals begin to rain down and swirl around the office. Very sassy.)

Oh, Dr. John
What am I doing
What am I doing I wrong?

Cuz I keep on trying
Something ain’t going
Something ain’t going on

[Another day, another break up]
Oh, Dr. John
[Hold on, and on,
Hold on, and on]

(more dancing. Sadly, I’m not a choreographer. You know the type: hand to the window thoughtfully, pulling at hair, to his knees, and so on.)

I keep on trying
[Another day, another wake up]

We hold on, and on
We hold on, and on

Oh, Dr. John
[Another day, another wake up]

We hold on, and on
We hold on, and on
[Another day, another wake up]

[I keep on trying]
We hold on, and on
We hold on, and on

Oh, Dr. John
What am I doing
What am I doing wrong?
Cuz I keep on trying
Something ain’t going
Something ain’t going on

(he seems to be walking a thin and dangerous line between laughing maniacally and cracking up completely into tears.)

Dr. John

Ooh, ooh, ooh

(he gently lays back down on the couch, back into the pose he was in when the song started. he almost whispers these last words.)

Dr. John.

(suddenly, another closeup on the eyes, and were back in the normal, boring office. BILL has been laying there the whole time, apparently singing to the DOCTOR. He blinks rapidly, cheeks flushed with embarrassment.)

BILL: Sorry, Doctor. Was it…weird?

DR: I don’t know, Bill…was it weird for you?

BILL: (shellshocked) Oh yeah.

DR: …Was my Freud bust singing again?

(an uncomfortable silence. BILL lets out a long breath, sadly admitting it)

BILL: Yes.